bound to rise on occasions when u feel u are not wanted. what do u say? of course u might have never got any doubts because u were our precious baby from the very first. but doubts are there.
how can one ask certain questions when they will only mean raising cain in yourself? total depression. last time it happened there was someone to briefly give respite and perhaps hope and smile for everyday, but that was ephemeral . gave ideas for the book a too and was exciting and fun while it lasted. woh khatra tal gaya, callie but now new nightmares not exactly but definitely depressing ideas keep cropping up.
am i the only one he had sex with?
does he try to meet all these women on his chat and internet list?
what is he trying to do? trying to chat up the young women, with no regrets and care for us?
may or may not be an affair but where does this lead to? trying to known for his charm? bah!
these are terrible times and after finding his cousin hugging him or vice versa certainly a very unhealthy mind and environment, i don't know if i feel upto anything. sometimes i think i will ignore him but that is so housewifely. i may not be working but self respect hi koi cheez hoti hai. i wish how i wish u were there with me or best i was there with u. until i finish thses 3 responsibilities or should i call them labour of love, i cannot go anywhere not even to be mad. though i feel i will go mad soon. whose agenda is this i wonder, i am sure my parents and in laws will be happy to see the last of me. what more can be said sadder for a person than this that she had never been loved or wanted by anyone she knew except maybe her dogs and dreams.
